Movie Review: The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012)

 Ahoy, mates!

Step aboard my ship as I write out this review! We will be waging war with the high seas, so hold on and enjoy!

My guarantee: On ALL of my reviews there are NO spoilers unless I give you warning. This is spoiler free!


The Pirates! Band of Misfits (2012):

Also known as The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists!
Based on: The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists! - by Gideon Defoe.
The Pirates are happy with their rooting and plundering, except they haven’t had any luck lately. No matter, as they have more important things to attend to, like the Pirate of the Year competition which they hope the Pirate Captain will win! Their chances are looking slim next to the others, so they decide to get more gold to show how impressive they are. After looting a ship that turns out to be only a science expedition they run into Charles Darwin who recognizes the Pirate’s “parrot” to be a dodo! He makes the case that Polly could gain him back some prestige in the Scientist of the Year awards. The Pirates agree to help him in order to get enough gold to win the Pirate of the Year competition. Everything seems to be going well, but is the tide about the turn?

Genres: Animated, Adventure, Claymation.
Length: approx. 88 minutes.
Script: 9, blast! I can’t remember if there were any bad words and swearing or not. I’m giving this a tentative score of 9 because of that.
Crew: Directed by: Peter Lord & Jeff Newitt. Written by: Gideon Defoe.
Starring the voices of:
Hugh Grant as The Pirate Captain.

Martin Freeman, Brendan Gleeson, Russell Tovey, Anton Yelchin, Ashley Jensen, Al Roker, & Ben Whitehead as his crew.

David Tennant as Charles Darwin.
Imelda Staunton as Queen Victoria.
Jeremy Piven as Black Bellamy.
Salma Hayek as Cutlass Liz.
Brian Blessed as The Pirate King.
Lenny Henry as Peg Leg Hastings.
Mike Cooper as Admiral Collingwood.
David Schneider as Scarlett Morgan.
Tom Doggart, Sophie Jerrold, Sophie Laughton, Peter Lord, Kayvan Novak, & David Schaal provide additional voices.
Costumes: 6, there is a time when someone is sitting in a bathtub but not wearing anything for a few minutes and though we don’t see anything, it’s still inappropriate and not particularly funny. There are low costumes, too.
Animation: 9, I’m partial to claymation so I like it a lot. I think it’s a unique and fun style! I like how all of the characters were made to look.

Animation by: Aardman Animations.
Music: 6, not “bad” but not memorable in any way. It does capture the “piraty feel” in places.
Music by: Theodore Shapiro.
Quotability: 7, nothing really comes to mind except this:

“It’s treacherous villainy! It’s villainous treachery!”

Content: 6, there is crude humor involving pirates, drinking, suggestive things, and killing. I thought it was a little vulgar in places, but from what I read of the book (2/3) it is tame. It’s mostly suitable for kids, who are the main audience.
Originality: 8, I wouldn’t go overboard and say I’ve never seen anything like it, but there are some fun elements.
Good For: anyone who likes claymation, families.
Age Range: I’d say the range for this movie is about from 8 up, but when you get to a certain age you might just be bored of it, which is understandable. It depends on the person.
Overall Score: 7.

Worth watching?: Yes, actually! You might’ve thought that this review was going downhill, but there was a kernel of gold hidden within. It had a really good message which I’ll talk about that more in a minute.
Will I watch again?: If I had nothing else to do, then maybe. Or if I was sick. Actually, this seems like it would be a very good movie to watch if you are ill because it will make you laugh and feel better!


For the blogathon:
This is my second entry in Hamlette’s We ❤ Pirates Week! You won’t want to miss plundering the list of participants HERE. 

I’d had notes on this movie for awhile so when Hamlette announced it I jumped aboard ship immediately!


I had originally planned to review the book, too, and compare the two, but 2/3 into the audiobook I gave up because I couldn’t stand it anymore. You see, it’s just that I highly dislike satire. I have a really hard time understanding it and that is not my kind of humor at all. My sister said, “I told you so.”

I had gone into the book expecting it to be a fun and cute romp with pirates like the movie but instead was given nothing but cruelty and parody and satire. Not my kind of thing at all. From what I read, the plots hardly matched up! Therefore I was surprised by this little introduction from the Pirate Captain:

“...You see, there’s a good chance that in your more enlightened times of hover boards and A-semetrical haircuts, a daring theatrical impresario will have decided to adapt my exciting adventure with scientists into some sort of morion picture to be exhibited at your local zoetrope club. Probably, you will notice how the motion picture contains a number of differences from the book you are now listening to. I would like to reassure you that this is not because of any sinister plot to rewrite history, it’s simply that certain things are better suited to the page than to the inside of a spinning metal drum. For example, it may be that the villain in said motion picture is Queen Victoria rather than the diabolical bishop of Oxford...

“...And perhaps the motion picture contains an entire plot to do with me owning a dodo, which is obviously a ridiculous and unlikely flight of fancy. Though I would very much like to own a dodo instead of our idiot parrot, Gary, who is frankly, a nuisance. But, rest assured, that in both zoetrope display and book, my beard is still luxuriant, Black Bellamy is still a fiend with eyes of the darkest pitch, and there’s still a good bit where a chimpanzee gets dressed up in a waistcoat, and most importantly, at no point does anybody mistakenly think it is somehow inherently funny to “talk like a pirate”....”

The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists! - by Gideon Defoe.

I couldn’t fathom how this little note could be so accurate to something that was so different. The answer: Gideon Defoe, the author of the book, also wrote the screenplay. I’m very pleased with all of the changes that he made, which is such a rare thing for me to say.

If you haven’t experienced either then you might wonder why I’m so surprised so I’ll explain. The book is supposed to be full of humor for the sake of humor. It showed pirates as resembling real pirates with killing and cruelty willy-nilly. That’s not what I want to talk about, as this is Hamlette’s We ❤ Pirates Week! We want to talk about why we like them!

So why do we like pirates, and does that change from the book to the movie for any reason?

Yes, it does change. In the book it’s all about what the next adventure is, whereas the message of this movie is family. None of the pirates are actually related, but they are a crew and work together through it all. I think that is one of the many charms fictional pirates bring us, a camaraderie to bring them through the hardest storms.

“What is the best part of being a pirate?” Well, that’s exactly what is answered in this movie. Maybe memories and companionship are the real gold.


Thanks to Hamlette for hosting! Make sure to check out the participants HERE.

Thanks for reading! Has anyone else seen this? What is your favorite claymation movie? Why do you think that we like pirates so much?

MovieCritic

The We ❤ Pirates Week Tag!

Hello, my scalawags!

Are you ready for a party? I certainly am! I’m dancing around with excitement over here! 

The party is Hamlette’s We ❤ Pirates Week! 

She didn’t host one last year, but the three years previously she had a whole week set aside for us folks to obsess over fandoms, and this year we arrrrrrr talking about pirates!

I have another post coming up, but right now I’ll answer her tag questions. Savvy?

I usually try to make myself think harder by not answering any of the questions with the same movies/books, but I’m not going to hold myself to that this time. Why? To get myself straightened out I made a list of everything related to pirates that I have ever dealt with. It was surprisingly short, which should be remedied. Let’s just jump in then!

SPOILERS for Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (2007), but that’s it. Don’t read this if you haven’t seen that or I’ll make you walk the plank!

The questions:
1.  What are your favorite pirate movies or books?

The question is plural, so I can freely name many! I could go on into infinity! Wait, you don't want that?

Well, I guess I'll limit myself.

The Pirates of the Caribbean movies: Curse of the Black Pearl (2003), Dead Man’s Chest (2006), and At World’s End (2007) (I’ve seen the fourth and it’s okay but not brilliant, and I haven’t seen the latest). Looking at all these gifs I have in this post has really made me want to revisit this series!

Captain Blood (1935). This had all of the swashbuckling goodness! This is one of the few “older” (pre 2000s) pirate movies that I’ve seen, so I would love recommendations as I greatly enjoyed this one!

The Pirate Hunter Chronicles: Ships, Secrets, and Survivors - by Sarah Rodecker and Helena George (they don’t love pirates like we do as they are hunters of pirates, but the story revolves so much around pirates that it definitely could be called a pirate book).


2.  Who are your favorite fictional pirates?

Captain Jack Sparrow from The Pirates of the Caribbean. He’s crazy, but: “Crazy people don’t know they’re crazy. I know I’m crazy, therefore I’m not crazy, isn’t that crazy?” which honestly describes me. That’s pretty much my motto in life.

Okay, and all of the other pirates from The Pirates of the Caribbean: Will Turner, Elizabeth Swan (here’s where the spoilers come in, as I loved her as the Pirate King!), Captain Hector Barbossa, all of them!

Captain Peter Blood from Captain Blood (1935). His actions are very understandable, but not cruel!

Captain Hook from any version of Peter Pan. I don’t like him because he is the villain, but he’s one of those villains that you just have to appreciate how well written he is. He is terrifying! There are so many excellent portrayals of him, but lately I’ve been considering Rhys Ifans who plays him in the miniseries Neverland (2011). Sure, I absolutely HATE him, but how quickly he took to piracy is impressive.

Luigi Vampa and his crew from The Count of Monte Cristo (2002). He is only there for a few minutes, but I still love his part for some reason. He influences Edmund’s story! Apparently there’s more of him in the book? I’ll find out soon.

3.  What do you like best about pirate stories? (Themes, costumes, aesthetic, etc.)

Based on the several Pinterest boards that I have, probably the aesthetics. Sword fights are certainly taken into consideration. If themes are woven in nicely then I will always appreciate that. Especially if it has any resemblance to Robin Hood. You can’t go wrong with that, right?

4.  If you were going to play a pirate on the stage or screen, what would your costume look like?

Something easy to move around in like this, but it could have simpler fabric colors:

Source

If I had to have some (PRETEND) pirate accessory, I wouldn’t mind an eye patch.

Also, one year I dressed up like Captain Hook and it was pretty sweet, so I wouldn’t mind doing that again. It was pretty convincing, too, because quite a few people I know didn’t recognize me! You can see it HERE.

5.  What pirate ship would you like to serve on?

I would love to be part of Auburn Sally’s crew on her ship in Starbordia from the book The Land of Stories: An Author’s Odyssey - by Chris Colfer. It’s an all female crew and hilarious things happen. It was the fifth book in the series and the most epic book ever! The last book really disappointed, but this one was a treasure.

6.  Any favorite sea shanties or pirate songs?

What do you do with a cursed Ashton?
What do you do with a cursed Ashton?
Oh what do you do with a cursed Ashton early in the morning?

I should know so many but my mind is failing me. "Leave Her Johnny" is a classic that is a tad sad. For a more inspiring one, I like "The Mary Ellen Carter".


7.  Have you ever participated in International Talk Like a Pirate Day?

Every year I think, “Oh, that’s such a cool idea!” and start to do it, but then after one “Arrr!”...

I get distracted and complete forget what I was doing.


8.  Would you like to go sailing on a real tall ship?

You bet! I can tell tall tales and the higher it is the more fun it will be to do this:

But actually I just really like boats, so yes please.


9.  Have you ever learned anything about real pirates, or do you tend to stick to the fictional kind?

I was forced to do some research back in 2019 because I decided to do a crazy thing and write my own pirate story/novel for NaNoWriMo. It needs MAJOR rewrites as there are not enough “piraty” things or mystery, but I’m rather pleased with it. So yes, I know a thing or two about actual pirates, but I have the skill set (ha, as if) to make it fictional.


10. Why is the rum gone?

Because I have something much better:

I had to get that liquid out of there to use for this, ‘cause where else was I going to put my dirt?




Thanks to Hamlette for hosting! This is jolly good fun, and I recommend all of you checking out the other posts HERE. If you want some treasure of your own, check out Hamlette’s giveaway! You might get something rare indeed.

What do all of you think of my answers? Please recommend pirate books and movies galore to me!

MovieCritic

Book Review: Ships, Secrets, & Survivors - by Sarah Rodecker and Helena George

Ahoy, mates!

Today I am participating in the blog tour of Helena George and Sarah Rodecker's debut novel, the first in The Pirate Hunter Chronicles! For more details on this book check out the other spots on the blog tour HERE or HERE.

My guarantee: On ALL of my reviews there are NO spoilers unless I give you warning. This is spoiler free!

Disclaimer: I got a free copy in exchange for an honest review. These opinions are my own.


Ships, Secrets, & Survivors - by Sarah Rodecker and Helena George:

The Scaera Dumeda is a test for those wishing to become ambassadors for the Alliance. People sail from all over to get in. Princess Adima knows that she can do better for her country by being in it and is hopeful for entry to the tests. Ravin is on the run from his past, and when his name is called he knows something is terribly wrong. Both of them find themselves wrapped up in an adventure that leads to the sea with the Captain Jay Hill and his crew. Who is behind all of this, and is it too late to prove that they aren't murderers?
Genre: Swashbucker, Adventure, Fantasy.
Characters: 10! I love each and every one of them! They are all so real! I would talk about all of them, but I'm limiting myself to only my top favorites:
Ravin: You have to love this quiet guy indecisivewith a dark past he is running from! His dialogue is the most accurate of all time. I just feel for him.
Justin: This guy, this guy, is hilarious! My favorite of all of them.
Josiah: He's so positive and kind, he just is a sweetheart!
Adi: I love how quick on her feet she is and can make so many decisions! As someone who is the most indecisive in the world, I loved that she is able to do that.
Ash: Of all the characters, I want to know more about her! She is mysterious and tough, but a good leader in training!
Jay Hill: Jay commands all of your attention, so I have to grant it to him. He is the showman! His love for his crew is so great.
Words: 10, characters are mentioned as swearing, but all of the words themselves are omitted, which I really appreciated.
"If you look a horrible disaster, then you're all the more likely to get your named called and have to stand in front of all the people, right?"
Content: 8, there is violence, mentions of blood, and people being sick. There are deaths and killing, but there are discussions around that which are super thought provoking. Characters are hurt and there are mentions of abuse, but are shown as bad.
"If you think you're the only one here with a past, look around. We all have stories to tell, some dirtier than others."
Originality: 10, this gets a full score out of me! At every turn there is something new and I love it. Magical ships, tests for leadership, ragtag crews, count me in!
Good For: any fantasy and pirate story lovers.
Age Range: There are a lot of deaths and whatnot, but that depends on each individual's personal preference. I think I would've been fine with reading this when I was younger than 13, but that's just me.
Overall Score: 9.5!
Worth reading?: Yes, indeed! I feel so fulfilled with my daily dose of adventure now! The plot is so engaging, I'm really looking forward to more stories in this series!
Will I read again?: So far I have read it twice, and I can see this as something to enjoy from time to time, so yes!
Bonus thoughts:
This is an epic adventure if you're every looking for one! I would definitely recommend it.

Find more information on Goodreads.
Order on the WEBSITE or AMAZON.


Sarah and Helena are also hosting an awesome giveaway which I suggest you check out right HERE, right now. There is some incredible stuff there to send this book off into the world! Check both of their blogs and congratulate them on this achievement!

A huge thank you to them for allowing me to be part of this!

Thanks to all of you for reading! Have I peaked your interest? I hope I have, because this book is totally worth it!

MovieCritic

Movie Review: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)

Ahoy, matey!

This fine day that ye find yerselves in just 'appens to be National Talk Like a Pirate Day!
Because of this occasion I am in a jolly mood to write a film review. Enjoy yerselves!

"I knew there was a good reason."

(Whew, it is really hard to type like this)

Here are the links to when I reviewed the first two movies:
Curse of the Black Pearl
Dead Man's Chest

My guarantee: On ALL of my reviews there are NO spoilers unless I give you warning.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007):

Based on: the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland.
"For certain you have to be lost to find something that cannot be found, else everyone would know where it is."
Continuing from where the second movie ended, the crew head to Davy Jones's Locker to get help. They encounter different tests, and they also find that the loyalties among the crew might be divided. With the East Indian Trading Company on the rise and in control of the sea, pirates from all around the world will have to decide, is worth it to all join together and fight?
"And so despair leads to betrayal."

Genre: Swashbuckler, Adventure.

Length: approx. 169 minutes. Yeah, it's really long.

Costumes: 6, there are scenes were people are wearing no shirts, or things are low.

Script: 9, I didn't notice any bad words, and I'm usually very sensitive to that.
"Words whispered through prison bars loose their charm."

Crew:

Directed by: Gore Verbinski.

Written by: Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio.

Starring:
Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow.

"'You're mad!'

'Thank goodness for that because if I wasn't this probably wouldn't work.'" (This is actually one of my mottoes)

Orlando Bloom as Will Turner.

Keira Knightley as Elizabeth Swann.
Geoffrey Rush as Hector Barbossa.
Bill Nighy as Davy Jones.

Tom Hollander as Cutler Beckett.

Kevin R. McNally as Gibbs.
Lee Arenberg and Mackenzie Crook as Pintel and Ragetti.

Jack Davenport as James Norrington.

Chow Yun-fat as Sao Feng.

Naomie Harris as Tia Dalma.

Stellan Skarsgård as Bootstrap Bill Turner.

Martin Klebba as Marty.

David Bailie as Cotton.
Jonathan Pryce as Weatherby Swann.
David Schofield as Mr. Mercer.
Keith Richards as Edward Teague.
Greg Ellis as Theodore Groves.

Cinematography: 9, it has some really cool things, though sometimes the CGI is a little obvious.

Cinematography by: Dariusz Wolski.

Music: 10! Oh, it is so good! One of my favorites.

Music by: Hans Zimmer.

Quotes: 9, "Now we're being followed by rocks. Never had that before."

Storyline: 5, fighting, violence, gruesome, death, hanging, bringing people back from the dead, drinking, and some very suggestive things. There is this one rather suggestive scene (with what leads up to it and what follows), but I was actually really pleased with how they did it because I had remembered it differently.
"Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness."

Good For: Anyone who loves swashbucklers (that's me) and adventure movies, whoever has had to make hard decisions, anyone who is missing people.

Age Range: It is rated PG-13 because there is a lot of fighting (and the suggestive scene I mentioned), and I would agree with that.

Overall Score: 8!

"We need to interrogate survivors and that works best when they're alive."

Bonus thoughts:
This movie is so long, and there is so much in here! I feel like I would understand more of it if I rewatched it a lot, but it is hard to find the time. The first and second movies will always be my favorites just because this one is a little too weird for me. It is a very satisfying conclusion (*cough*but now it isn't the end*cough*). Megan wrote a really good post on it that you should check out! (There are spoilers though).


Thank ye fer readin'! Which of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies is your favorite? Have a good National Talk Like a Pirate Day!

MovieCritic

Movie Review: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006)

Hello!

Remember way back in October of 2017 when I reviewed the original Pirates of the Caribbean? Well, I'm finally getting around to the sequels. Sorry about the long wait.

Why am I getting to it now? Yesterday was Johnny Depp's birthday, so I have an excuse!

Enjoy!

My guarantee: On ALL of my reviews there are NO spoilers unless I give you warning.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006):

Based on: the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland. (I still can't get over how they based this on a ride. Wow.)

'"My compass is unique."

"Unique here meaning broken."'

William Turner and Elizabeth Swann have been thrown in jail for assisting in the escape of a pirate. Lord Becket will only realize them from their fate if Will goes to find Jack Sparrow and brings back his compass. When Will finds him, Jack agrees to give him the compass, if he will help him find a key. The key unlocks a chest where the contents could control the whole sea. Jack tricks Will onto getting aboard the Flying Dutchman, the ship of Davy Jones and his undead pirate crew. Will finds that there may be more at stake then his and Elizabeth's lives. Meanwhile, Elizabeth escaped jail, along with carrying papers of mark. She goes across the sea to once again find William Turner.

'"It's a key!"

"No, much, much better: it's a drawing of a key."'

Genre: Swashbuckler, Adventure.

Length: approx. 150 minutes (yeah, it's long).

Costumes: 6, there are some low things, and several times when people are not wearing shirts.

Script: 8, one or two bad words.

'"You actually were telling the truth!"

"I do that a lot actually, you people are always surprised."'

Crew:

Directed by: Gore Verbinski.

Written by: Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio.

Starring:
Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow.

Orlando Bloom as Will Turner. "You have a touch of destiny about you."

Keira Knightley as Elizabeth Swann.

Bill Nighy as Davy Jones.

Stellan Skarsgård as "Bootstrap Bill" Turner.
Jack Davenport as James Norrington.
Kevin McNally as Gibbs.

Tom Hollander as Lord Beckett.
Jonathan Pryce as Governor Swann.
Lee Arenberg as Pintel.

Mackenzie Crook as Ragetti.
Naomie Harris as Tia Dalma.

Cinematography: 9, so there are parts that are a little dark, and others that you can obviously see the CGI, but the choreography is AMAZING. There is a fight scene in here that is so awesome, it is my favorite in any movie. (It isn't that violent, it is mostly a sword fight.)

Cinematography by: Dariusz Wolski

Music: 10! I love this score.

Music by: Hans Zimmer.

Quotes: 8. My sister and I quote this almost all the time:
"I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt! And guess what's inside it!"

Oscars won: Best Visual Effects.

Storyline: 5, Oh dear. Okay, so there is: death, gross things, scary things, drinking, smoking, kissing, torture, suggestive things, cannibalism, and loss of limbs. I am exhausted after typing all of that.

Good For: people who enjoy swashbucklers, people who like adventure.

Age Range: This is rated PG-13, so I would go with that (though I watched it when I was younger).

Overall Score: 7.5.

Bonus thoughts:
Usually I don't really like sequels, especially sequels that are building up to more sequels, but I really like this one. None of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies are as good as Curse of the Black Pearl, but this one is really good. As I said, there are problems with it, but I LOVE the sword fights and music. Oh yeah.

Right now, my header has a picture from this movie:

The bottom center one. The top center one is from the first movie.


Have you seen this? What do you think? Thank you so much for reading!

MovieCritic